Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Tower Ravens Go Undercover

Britain quietly prepares for a new invasion from Europe from the air but this time any bomb is more likely to be that warm, sticky smelly variety. H5N1 is on the move and is coming to a chicken near you.

Taking no chances with H5N1 is the guys and ravens of the Tower of London. The ravens of the Tower of London have been shut into the Tower until further notice. It is usually only those who displeased the reigning British monarch that were shut up in the Tower for a stretch ... usually on a rack. So what are these legendary ravens? These special birds date back to distant British legend of a guy called Bran who lost his head and ended up for some reason buried under the Tower of London; at least his head did and the rest of his body ended up in a lost property section somewhere in Britain. Legend has it that if the ravens of the Tower died, or decided to take a short vacation, it was said that Britain and the Monarchy would fall.

The Republican movement has alas suffered a setback when it was decided that the ravens would be placed out of harms way from H5N1 infection by spending their days inside the Tower, last occupied by the German Nazi, Rudolf Hess. We are told the kingdom is no longer under threat, and whilst British chickens are sweating it out the ravens are enjoying meals served by their very own top rated chef.

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